Observing MLK Jr's Bithday Causes Early Release Across Much of the Nation
Jeremiah's school was dismissed at 12:30 today and will take Monday off, as most school children in the US will I imagine. Luckily, Mason got out at noon, so there was no carpool panic. That is until I noticed Mason doing the peepee dance in the car. Thankfully, the urge subsided long enough for us to decide get him something unhealthy to nibble on the way to fetch Jeremiah.
Sonic is disgusting. I realize this very subjective assessment may be cause for much public outcry, mostly among readers who regularly enjoy stuffed hal-uh-pee-nyo popperz and foot long chilicheezconeyz (I just vomited in my mouth a little). Sonic is slow. They are in fact slower than they are disgusting. Realizing we'd be late for Jeremiah unless I was somehow able to light a fire under the carhop's skates, I jumped out to go inside and get our order AND take Mason to their scary restroom.
Got out, went around to Mae's door and when I opened it, I saw the look. The unmistakable expression of very wet discomfort. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, soaked. Pants, soaked. Socks and shoes, soaked. Floor mat, yes, that too. I used to carry spares I'd keep next to the extra tire. Not any more. Just having gotten back from the gym, I did have a couple of towels and a washcloth, so I got back in the car, he stripped down - probably not the first time someone's gotten naked below the waist in that parking lot - and I dabbed and blotted w/ MY FILTHY GYM TOWELS. Then I thought this is not good.
Dear gawd, please do not let my little boy contract Ebola or some STD from my gym bag's contents, because I know late stage syphilis can cause blindness, and if he's made it to five and his brother has not already smitten his vision, then it's only fair that he deserves a long lifetime of 20/20 20/30, plus we just saw the high $$$ opthalmologist just Wednesday and that would be such a waste because as it turns out Mason doesn't need the glasses we thought he was going to have to get but wouldn't have worn anyway. That's all for today, I think. Amen
I resolve to return to keeping spares in the car: back-up Ninja Turtles, wipes, a fresh towel and shoes, all hermetically sealed in an expensive, air tight Haliburton case. Additionally, I resolve to get my name on the Mother of the Year Ballot in '07 because for reasons unknown to me, I have been overlooked for seven straight years. What gives? Maybe being a sometimes Sonic customer automatically disqualifies me. Or maybe it's because I let them brush their teeth in the car, swallowing fluoride, on the way to school, or feed them after 7:30, or, shoot, the list is too long.
The worst part about Mason sitting in his booster, covering his naked self w/ my icky sweatshirt, was that we couldn't go in to TCBY. We had to use the drive through. Mason chose Rainbow ice cream and Jeremiah picked Cotton Candy. As we're heading home Jeremiah said to Mason, "Hey, Mason, let me see your poop before you flush it so I can see what color it is. What color do you think it's going to be?" They both thought the unnaturally bright colors would somehow magically be preserved throughout the digestive process. Personally, I voted for a muted green, sort of spirulina-ish. They are on the lookout for bright pink and cobalt blue. I'm afraid they're going to be disappointed.
Oh, along w/ the case of spare emergency items, I need to stash a hand held dictaphone thingy because I know I forget 87% of the things they say that make me chuckle and guffaw.
Sonic is disgusting. I realize this very subjective assessment may be cause for much public outcry, mostly among readers who regularly enjoy stuffed hal-uh-pee-nyo popperz and foot long chilicheezconeyz (I just vomited in my mouth a little). Sonic is slow. They are in fact slower than they are disgusting. Realizing we'd be late for Jeremiah unless I was somehow able to light a fire under the carhop's skates, I jumped out to go inside and get our order AND take Mason to their scary restroom.
Got out, went around to Mae's door and when I opened it, I saw the look. The unmistakable expression of very wet discomfort. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, soaked. Pants, soaked. Socks and shoes, soaked. Floor mat, yes, that too. I used to carry spares I'd keep next to the extra tire. Not any more. Just having gotten back from the gym, I did have a couple of towels and a washcloth, so I got back in the car, he stripped down - probably not the first time someone's gotten naked below the waist in that parking lot - and I dabbed and blotted w/ MY FILTHY GYM TOWELS. Then I thought this is not good.
Dear gawd, please do not let my little boy contract Ebola or some STD from my gym bag's contents, because I know late stage syphilis can cause blindness, and if he's made it to five and his brother has not already smitten his vision, then it's only fair that he deserves a long lifetime of 20/20 20/30, plus we just saw the high $$$ opthalmologist just Wednesday and that would be such a waste because as it turns out Mason doesn't need the glasses we thought he was going to have to get but wouldn't have worn anyway. That's all for today, I think. Amen
I resolve to return to keeping spares in the car: back-up Ninja Turtles, wipes, a fresh towel and shoes, all hermetically sealed in an expensive, air tight Haliburton case. Additionally, I resolve to get my name on the Mother of the Year Ballot in '07 because for reasons unknown to me, I have been overlooked for seven straight years. What gives? Maybe being a sometimes Sonic customer automatically disqualifies me. Or maybe it's because I let them brush their teeth in the car, swallowing fluoride, on the way to school, or feed them after 7:30, or, shoot, the list is too long.
The worst part about Mason sitting in his booster, covering his naked self w/ my icky sweatshirt, was that we couldn't go in to TCBY. We had to use the drive through. Mason chose Rainbow ice cream and Jeremiah picked Cotton Candy. As we're heading home Jeremiah said to Mason, "Hey, Mason, let me see your poop before you flush it so I can see what color it is. What color do you think it's going to be?" They both thought the unnaturally bright colors would somehow magically be preserved throughout the digestive process. Personally, I voted for a muted green, sort of spirulina-ish. They are on the lookout for bright pink and cobalt blue. I'm afraid they're going to be disappointed.
Oh, along w/ the case of spare emergency items, I need to stash a hand held dictaphone thingy because I know I forget 87% of the things they say that make me chuckle and guffaw.
posted by becky at 1:29 PM
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